Saturday, May 30, 2009

Hilariously Jaded

HI again!
I figured I would blog a little bit about today before I go off and do stuff tomorrow and overwhelm myself with things to blog.

I haven't been sleeping well in our odd sleep schedule bit of time I get the chance.. surprisingly it's not entirely insomnia caused by the dawn breaking...I am TOO hot, not that it is too hot- just me. Night sweats- something fierce- as soon as I get sleepy even.Perhaps it's the humidity, or allergies I am also sneezing up a storm, I hope I am not getting sick .
Well , that kept me up all morning ..long after Ri got up and ready for work.I took a bath, I tried everything to cool off. Rory got mail this morning, a new pink toy shelfhamper thing from a friend online(thankyouthankyouthankyouthankyou)- I hung it before she even woke up ..she isn't too impressed with how high the top shelf of it is.Thing is huge.

I did get to sleep for a little bit- the sound of the power company finally cutting down that dangling tree limb woke us up.Though somehow it was really neat to watch them cut it down around the wire.We snacked on fruit and sat at the window..oh, how easily we are entertained ,huh?

It was finally not raining...Rory begged for a bike ride
-we ran into Jade(ri's 14 yr old nephew).Who begins every meeting with the most shockingly inappropriate thing he can think of to say "I have a 16 yr old bisexual girlfriend" ..and "I saw some kids smoking in the locker room today"


he's a good kid though..and Rory thinks he is hilarious.


My camera foiled Jade- he took this pic with my cam upside down, but it rights itself
(i was distracted by people coming in the park)

Got home and jumped in ANOTHER shower- it was sooo hot I was dripping.Rory came in and joined me. While the dog drank twenty bowls of water.

Oh, I checked on out little garden today- and we have wee little seedlings!! Rory's chamomile is doing the best, the little pot was so full of little leaves i almost thought it was algae!
I handed the net over to Rory , put on the radio and cleaned up a bit.Not as much as I meant to though..didn't vacuum or concur the laundry pile-sigh.Instead I coaxed the net back from Rory with a RocketPop and laid down half asleep all evening cruising the net,until Ri got home.

Been messing around with photoshop some more


I thought my tangly hair would make good mermaid hair..but you can't really tell.I plan on trying the mermaid pic again.



Tomorrow(well...today now) it will be 10 YEARS since we 1st kissed.. ten years we have been together! crazy.
He has the day off . We need to head to St.auggy to get the oil changed. Hopefully,Lissy(and fam) she will meet us up there, we can hang out and be touristy.
It should be a very nice day :)

(Val took this pic on my birthday-i'm fairly certain it was the night of- almost 10 yrs ago...and yes that makes me feel old)


Well, its 6thirty in the morn, I need some sort of sleep... off to go be a zombie

Friday, May 29, 2009

A Vlog type post

I am liking youtube lately.. little segments of other peoples lame little lives... yup, I even like the lame ones,perhaps even prefer the lame ones.
..hope you do too:

Ri is sorta embarrassed I uploaded the vid, but ya heard me warn him!!
I like it.. I may record things more often...so , you should ,like, subscribe to my(Ri's ) youtube channel. I still can think of at least a dozen people who should vlog, and I am not one.

It was Ri's day off today( OBVIOUSLY) , we had a good day- stormed most of the day.
There is still a big limb dangling on the powerlines in front of our house... the other day the Florida power guy drove up to investigate the report RI made, He knocked on our door and pointed at the limb mouth agape "I can't believe that hasn't caught fire!! I will get a crew out immediately"
I dunno where that crew is,
but, hey! the power is still on...and the limb is still not quite ablaze.
Rory was reluctant to let me tag along on their weekly father-daughter grocery trip, but we had an alright time. We even stopped into and picked her up some new shorts- she has out grown EVERYTHING just in the last week...but she is still too skinny for most size four pants,meh its too hot for pant's anyway.

So - anyway, it's three am.. Ri made us veggie chilli dogs and went to bed hours ago.
Rory is still awake munching on pizza and goldfish.
I'm going to go look for something to watch online..maybe do dishes...maybe.I don't know what to do about our weird sleep cycle.

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

A moment lasts all of a second, but the memory lives on forever


HI EVERYBODY!!!!


(or, anyone)

Between you and me, that is a modified t-shirt sleeve on my head there,like it?

We have been having moments of blinding hot sunshine in between really scary thunderstorms the past few days.
Rory and I did manage to finally find an sunshiney opening to plant those seeds and repot the aloe plant.Rory's little fingers are perfect for seeds. We will see if anything actually come of it- I have no faith in my gardening ability.

It was way tooo hot we came in and jumped in a cool shower.Our schedule has been crap. Not like nocturnal- but like three naps a day. I relish the 9pm nap, and have been getting some awesome rest in- but WHY does she seem To want to wake up at 2 am?!?!
Storm rolled in that night had Noobie hiding in the bathroom for DAYS. Being a big whiny baby.

Sunday ,We got loads of cleaning done in between our odd sleep cycles. Rory picked up her toys while I rearranged her room- trying to organize it some( she has way too much junk!! ), cleaned the bathroom,- all that stuff. Though the kitchen was a bit neglected instead( I usually do the kitchen more than anything).

Ri surprised us Sunday and showed up home early!
He even brought me a big bucket of soda again :). We Had plans to go out the next day to the blue crab festival.Somehow Rory fell asleep really early...and I followed.Of course that meant she was giving us hell at 3 am or so, wanting up. We begged her to just lay down and rest please rest...it was Noobie that helped though:the weather was still sort pf murky and Noobs was being a butt baby,she climbed right in bed practically on top of Rory and slept there.Cute! the only problem with that was now I was squished between Ri,Noobie and Rory- sleep was not so great after that.


After giving us so much hell about not being tired,Rory slept in later than me or Ri on Monday- I even got a nice shower by myself. We woke Rory up and started getting ready to leave,but the poor dog was following us around the house just begging for attention,even going as far as climbing on the couch to cuddle!We fell for it ,and got her ready to go to the festival ,too.

I had tried to get Rory to eat- but I didn't get much in here besides some cheerios..so she got carsick :( , we almost made it she puked as we pulled into the parking space!t wasn't much spit up at best, but I felt so bad poor thing! She was excited to go to the festival though ,wiped off drank down some water and was good to go.We went under the bridge on the new board walk-


with the bats- we could hear bats, not see them.Freaked Rory out.


As sicky as Rory was she begged to go on the spinning "berry go round" we had to buy a set of drastically overpriced ride tickets..but she just had to ride the rides.


Of course then she was scared on the berrygoround.


We rushed off to find her something that might help settle her empty tummy. Bought a cinna pretzel, which she didn't eat much of. ..it was too hot.90 and humid. It is either raining or sweltering at the blue crab every year. HARSH weather.


Seemed good for Noobie though-(too deep there though) have you ever seen a happier dog???She sort of drew a crowd with her river antics
10 years ago, I was 15 and my neighbor friends dragged me to the blue crab- I had nothing flattering to wear, but I went in hopes of running into the boy I was sort of dating- and beating Mel in a competition of "how many phone numbers can you get" (It was an effort to help her to rebound , to be happy and get over a recent break up..did I mention I was 15?).


--Instead ,I ended up spending the afternoon breaking up with the boy who spent no time with me, and ran into this guy I knew from tech class a few years before(and from the many of my friends who had borderline stalker crushes on him).We used to sort of chat in class, but I never thought her remembered me. We sat near that spot on the river chatted, and flirted terribly all day. I felt oddly comfortable around him from the very beginning, I felt like I could be a complete idiot with him and he would just play along..as we packed up my friends car to leave he hugged me- and then we kissed!I can't describe the feeling. I think I played that day over in my head a million times. A few days later we started dating.. years later moved in together, got a dog, got married ,had a kid, you know the story :)

I doubt Noobie cares for the story..(in fact ,this pic was right before she pooed on that spot, right in front of all the river facing booths ,and the newly on bond 'Cobra' of local celeb status of sorts)


I doubt Rory cares either...



(Rory could have went a few times down the slide, but refused.She was being rather pouty on the rides- it was getting really frustrating).


Rory went in the bounce house and fussed...we were about to take her out when a huge group of other kids joined her..she loved that for a minute before deciding there were too many big kids and got out. At least she stopped the over priced ride pouting.


We stopped and watched some pigs swimming and other delightfully southern sights.


Oh- Someone tell me how I managed to over do the patriotism?!- I didn't realize I was wearing my red hair wrap, with my white shirt and blue jeans until late in the day-HA! I did purposely put Rory in her red/white and blue shirt. I was also wearing this white shirt I wasn't sure about,when I bought it I feared it looked too maternity Lissy and mom assured me it did not..right then,that logic didn''t work when I walked past a preggy girl in the same shirt.sigh.


We walked around the crowded booths in the midday sun. It was way too hot. The moment when I realize me and Rory aren't suited for Florida summer...We pass people who haven't even broke a sweat, they are miserable hot and all, but they look fine, and have been out in it all day-while 5 minutes in our hair goes limp, our face turns beet read and we look like we just came out of a sauna.Poor kid ended up throwing up a little more from the heat. We bought her a sno-cone and a soda(we had a bottle of water-I poured it on her head and bought another though).I wish she hadn't inherited my tendency to get overheated. Rory did find some interesting things and seem to enjoy herself despite the heat exhaustion.



Noobie was the real spoiled angel one though. She walked through that crowd like a show dog. Letting anyone walk right up and pet her,and even nicely greeting every dog that went by!We got so many nice comments. Noobie pulled Ri into one booth -which we found filled with hand baked doggie biscuits...so yeah we had to get her some.


Overheated we headed back towards the river,Rory wanted to ride more rides. She did want to try and play a "carnival game" to win a bunny.(Oh!! I want a bunny!! Please! Can I have a bunny!!)..but I put on my Mommy hat and thought better of it, I have seen noobie do some terrible things to wild bunnies.Besides what sort of bunnies do they give away at a festival?!

Ri took Noobs back for a swim while I took Rory to spend her last two tickets on the inflataslide.I had to talk her out of a few big kid rides, and I tried to talk her into the fun house..she wanted the slide. It worked out well though, the guy let her go as many times as she wanted..and she did a few times.





On the way back to meet Ri I tried to cut through the little concert on the river. Rory stopped .shade , a girl singing she wasn't leaving.My music junkie..Luckily I spotted Ri and was able to wave him over.



We sat there for three or four songs.It was really nice.
Then headed home-HOT.




On the way there Noobie had done the cutest thing jumping to look over the bridge with us-i tried to mimic it on the way back, best I could get


We didn't stay terrible long,and we didn't buy much, or run into anyone..but we had a really nice time-It's the memories that I love about The Blue Crab Festival anyway, and the memories that are important on Memorial Day


Ri took Rory into the grocery store.We needed bread and soymilk-(I am sort of afraid to make bread in this humidity). .she begged to go in with him...so she could buy herself a candy ,I think.At least her belly seemed better and she ate and had ice cream .


After we got home and ate we called Val and headed over there. It was still early, and sunny so we were able to get a swim in. Rory was trying soooo hard to swim, she is doing really well. Pool was cooold , felt much better after being so hot. Found out in the little while we walked around got a lovely peasant top shaped farmer tan. Rory was soo tired her eyes had big red circles under them, but she was being pretty good. Not sharing well with Seth though. We need to work on the whole sharing thing.Or at least the 'tude she has...though it seems to mesh well with Seth's 'tude so maybe not.lol .Let them duke it out and problem solve on their own?Seems to work out in the end that way.. they both know then they are having the 'tude- or misbehaving.

I didn't get a single pic for fear of wetting my cam,:( . i did manage to wet my dreads a bit more than I wanted in the chlorine, but not too bad-I'm not worried.

Talked to Lissy for a little bit, she is having some crazy drama with an Exgf of Bo's talking trash on the interent about them AND Nickolai-dude , what sort of lowlife talks bad about a baby? Not one worth wasting mental energy on thats for sure. Lissy also spent another night in the er with Cole, he was weezing really bad and scared her.. but they said he is fine, still congested but on antibiotics, I hope he is all better and cleared up soon, poor guy.

Rory crashed when we got home, poor thing. I wasn't long after her- but yeah, she woke up again.I traded the bed with Ri and stayed up with her.Till waay late in the morn..and yeah slept a chunck of my afternoon away. I was super lazy all day- Had one of those weird moments of remebering some old stashed away items I suddenly wanted- like pictures, or that baggy of hair from when Ri cut his hair(thinking I can crothe them in as extensions and have sentimental value.LOL)- found a bunch junk i forgot about digging through storage, but none of the things I was looking for. Played around in photoshop a little, watched too much youtube - and tried to upload these stubborn pics that kept slowing down the whole laptop. Rory was sad it wass too hot/stormy to go out anywhere...but RI got her a copy of the movie Coraline so she watched that happily a few times, in between playing in her clean room(she loves her room clean)

Ri got off early- a little. And stopped and picked dinner up for us(Aunt flo has me horrible about not liking food right now- I feel gross,terrible headache :( ). - He got food from the present moment cafe , a raw food cafe in St.Auggy . Rory gave us greif about trying anything,( she was tired and fussy)- we finally managed to get her to eat the carrots and peas from inside the samosas... we all pretty much agreed the somosas were the best out of what he ordered.. Veggies were nice and fresh but all together the food was so-so.

After dinner we all fell asleep where we were sitting.. I woke up and brushed Rory's teeth, laid her back down thinking she would be going back to sleep..nope,sigh. So I got up and we ate , and sent Ri to the bedroom. 4:30 am bloggin' yup yup.

I have the prefect ending for this post:


Aww! the baby butt! Mooned by Mr.Cole.
PEACE AND TOFU CHICkEN GREASE,
BABYHELLFIRE

Friday, May 22, 2009

Things that shouldn't be....

Shouldn't have happeneds,
shouldn't be thinking about,
shouldn't be focused on,
shouldn't worry about,
shouldn'tve done when I should've been cleanining
shouldn't have drank so much coffee,
shouldn't have stayed up all night,
and prolly shouldn't even post about... that title seems themey-I'll run with it
-oh,and other stuff too.


Aw man,Where to start where to start....
I can't say we've have been up to a helluva lot, but stuffs been going on around me that bears delving into here.One of those times when I miss the old days of blogging -when no one I actually knew, actually read this...and I could vent and rant incoherently about people like some crazy youtube vlogger ,or something.

Chronological order my friend,first things first.. something I have put off mentioning here.. but I guess I may as well, because anyone locally with a curious mind would have already figured it out:

Did you know I have DOZENS of cousins??Not A dozen,DOZENS..on moms side alone ,I think, even.Word travels fast in a small town where most everyone is related.-OH, the point!..I'm getting there.

My baby sister Amy is pregnant.
Yes, she is underage.16 ,too young. She told my folks a month or so ago.My 1st reaction was a gasp and "I didn't even think she was sexually active"-no,Juno I don't know what that even means ,either- but still. DAMN.
She has decided to keep the baby. Lissy (and mom and Amy too, perhaps)- HAD had premonitions of Amy having a baby boy after Lissy had hers. (I know, all too common of an occurrence for my family, that is totally odd to other people. Also,yes, they are COMPLETELY convinced she will have a boy-insert my skeptical eyeroll)
.. so there was this sort of foreknowledge of possible expectations of events, that perhaps softened the blow.
or not.
I don't know.
I know, it didn't for dad..but still- they took it better than I would have expected they would. What else can you do I guess but think positive and get ready?
Well, anyway- she told Grandma("thegrape"), therefore within seconds at least 20 other people knew. Probably before any plans of spilling to the world(family history of miscarriages has us all gun shy of sharing such things)

So, anyway there is THAT.
No, I don't know exactly her plans.I think she maybe planning to go live with Lissy for a bit.I think her and her BF may have also broken up amidst all this- well, Honestly ,I almost prefer that to the original talk of marriage when the subject of teenage pregnancy came up.
(Yeah, I HAVE been with my hubby since I was 15..and I still think teen marriage is a BAD idea.I'll own that. )

I do worry how incredibly hard it will be for her- at that age- I can't even imagine. On top of her spine being held straight with metal rods-pregnancy alone sounds more uncomfy than norm- then there is childbirth ,and all before she even gets to the whole child rearing newborn hell part.I do know she is incredibly supported,and MUCH smarter and stronger, than you could normally attribute to a girl her age.

Damn girl has always grown too fast- trying to keep up with her teenage sisters when she was school age(and honestly, socially speaking ,I think she may have surpassed me then), and now keeping up with us in our 20s. Well, Amy if you are reading this, Sorry for spilling,er-more.


--
One topic out of the way onto the next...
AND forgive me if this post is all over the place, I am nocturnal again.Caffine , lack of sleep and boring social outlets makes me chatty. MWHAHAHAHA!


I spoke of the rain in my last post. Yeah, Ri had Monday off- AND Tuesday off. I woke up to the sound of rain, I got to sleep in again! I had a really nice morning-I even woke up before Rory, and got a shower.The constant rain had us all stir crazy though. I really wanted to go to a nearby store and see if I could find an aloe plant,for my hair(aloe is really helpful on neatening dry frizzies.- and you can bet that rainy humidity was had me frizzy!) It was pretty bad in spurts though and we weren't sure if it would ever let up enough to get out of the house.I WAS still in a good mood. I love the rainy days under most circumstances.

...but then Lissy wrote me. 1st she told me Her kittens were all dying. The one she had given Steph had died, they took it to the vet who claimed the mothers antibodies were killing her and there was nothing they could do but euthanize.(that just seems really weird to me, I still lean towards the thought it is a kitty upper respiratory infection)
So , the two seemingly fine but stuffy nosed boy kitties Lissy had left started to scare her. She was very very worried they were on their way out too with nothing they could do- and felt the whole house felt like death. :( . Later she said she ended up giving them to a freind- I don't know how they are doing, she is still quite worried about RickJames' health though.
(I had to explain to Rory today that she could not have Greggory the blackandwhite kitten, because he was sick and Lissy had to give him away to someone who could care for him :( . Rory cried for awhile,and begged us to let take her somewhere soon to pick out her own cat.)

that --2nd thing ,Lissy asked me was about something posted on myspace implying a friend of ours had passed away. I honestly brushed it off as a rumor, or a misunderstanding.

"NO!Surely not,I saw her just last week or so at winndixie- looking adorably pregnant and healthy, she laughed and bitched about WD with me for a second, gave me some gossip. Can't be THAT Heather"...but more people posted the same sorts of messages.
So ,I wrote one of them and asked. I kept thinking it would be some local gossip type rumor of a car accident or something, or maybe an inlaw of hers with the same name.I never want to accept such things.
.. I knew it was true when the reply was that she had a severe asthma attack,both her and her unborn 22wk daughter passed (they had named Madison ).
I knew she had bad asthma, I heard she had been hospitalized before from it.

She was so young,SO sweet and kindhearted I don't think I have ever met someone who didn't like her, she had two young sons near Rory's age- and I KNOW she was excited to be having a daughter.It is so compleatly heartbreaking.I cried all morning.
Her feneral is today/saturday.. I have never been a funeral, part of me feels like I should go..but I won't,or can't.
I did write her sister ,mostly to tell her I was there if she needed anything- but what can you say?


That dreary rain now, started to press down on me.Everything felt like death and sadness -tear flood water dark day rain, instead of that fresh wash away the heat, help the flowers, new beginning spring rain feel it had.
We had to get out of the house. We waited for an opening in the rain enough to get the carseat in the car, and headed out.It was already to late by then to make it to any of the local hardware type stores that sell plants- I doubted they would have anything at the grocer worth buying..about then we realized we had no idea where were going.When we passed the "yosh"(local owned store that's like a convenience store- with clothes,hairweave and lots of other weirdneses), I asked to stop in there. I have never done much beyond pop in there, it seemed like a decent place to pass some time. Rory was impatient, she just wanted to listen to Hannah Montana and cruise around.We picked out some spicey Mexican candy-Rory got herself a cheapo watergun /candy combo thing. We poked at the strange clothes and oddities before leaving.

We stopped home for a bite to eat- then stopped in Val's house to hang out.
We brought Noobs, who wanted desperately to love on Val's cats- Noobs and Rory are sooo cat obsessed, but most cats do not share that affection. ..though Val's female cat seemed to enjoy the attention from the kid. Rory played with Seth- they were soo funny together.




She got me while I took that pic
With the watersquirter out Noobs decided to spend the rest of the visit hiding under the table at Ri's feet.
Seth read to us a little bit-he is getting way too big too fast!!
while Rory ran off after Val's cats. We didn't stay terribly long- as they had to go to bed.

We tried to beat the nasty rain out- but we pretty much got soaked.
Ri came home and made lasagna and garlic bread for dinner -and he and Rory made a big batch of cookies,with chocolate chips I wasn't even aware we had!

Wednesday, Ri's boss decided to open despite the constant rain- so he worked both jobs--very slow day for them. Me and the nowbacktonocturnal Rory did pretty much nothing.Lazed around watching Tv or rocking to music.

She had a bunch of games going too- Little pets,toyboxes poured out all over AND baby dolls being cared for.
My overly lazy evening turned into a sleepless morning after Ri went to bed. I hate going to bed at dawn. I did manage to find some sleep.. eventually.

Woke up to a hot house and a cussing husband Thursday morning/afternoon.He had already went to the hardware store and back, to get a replacement thermostat... and was replacing it.BUT, it wasn't the thermostat, it was the breaker for the AC, so we would have to buy another.
I had a dentist appt that afternoon, shame because Ri wanted to switch for Thursday(after missing Monday and Tuesday at work) .
We took our time leisurely getting ready for the late afternoon apt,and making a mental list of the random items we need from in town. We were ready pretty early- but somehow between getting out the door , and the rainy day traffic we ended up running late. Ri told me it would be polite to call ahead and tell them we were running a little bit late... I called expecting them to be thankful I had called, instead -while we are IN the city JUST a few minutes away, I get told I have to reschedule!!!This is the cleaning I have already put off for months because I couldn't afford it, and now because I was polite enough to call I have to reschedule it!! AHHHHH!!!!! ARG! ..and Ri could have worked! damn damn double damn.I cried to the receptionist as she helped me figure a convenient time. Something about the hygenist having an appointment to go to and leaving at 4.
I am trying to tell myself that had I have NOT called, and shown up late they would have still would have been told I needed to reschedule as well.. not just because I called.kwim?

Still fucked oour entire plan for the day.
We went to lowes, to get the part Ri needed to get the Air conditioner back on, and an aloe plant.. Ri also somehow roped me into picking a bunch of seeds to plant.
.. We will see what I can grow back there, but I have no green thumb..I hope he keeps in mind I killed the last aloe plant,and at least a dozen other plants before that.
Rory decided she wanted a Red Rose, for some reason, and it was VERY important. I didn't want to buy her a rose plant , but we promised to go to another store and try.
We stopped by the mall on the way past, Ri had read their jeans where on sale, but we didn't find much.Walked around the tiny shell of a mall with Rory -she was mad they "didn't even have a gumball machine"-..we left in search of chinese food.
Found a little takeout place, and ate there.Rory ate a surprising amount, LOVE chinese food :) .
We were next to kmart so we figured we would look in there for a crotchet hook and hemp cord I wanted for my hair..they didn't have it, we DID find Rory a red rose though :) .

I HATE walmart.But I couldn't think of another local place that would have the craft section for what I wanted. UGH!We tried to rush in and out.
A note about my hair.
..and a pic..


My hair- it is a tangly mess. frizzy too.
I put aloe in it when we got home ,palmrolled a bit- even added some wraps around some of the really funky thick lump pieces.-LOL,do you know what it looks like?? We used to have the Lhasa-Apso doggy, long fur that trailed the ground and had to be brushed daily-when you didn't brush he would get a few funky little matted pieces under his belly and such....yeah, those in the end of a few sections of my hair.hAHAHA! I have dog hair ..on.my.head.

I played with the crotchet hook a little- I did ONE that was falling apart-congoing too much with the others..2 problems, I DO worry how that will effect my hair, I have heard good and bad about crotchet dreads falling out-holes in them-or not.
I do think it will be valuable in very occasional maintenance one day in the far future.
For now though, the one I crocheted together.. I don't like. It looks more like a braid, and it also doesn't feel strong and solid as some of the others reg knots.It seems as though it may even hinder the process-it DOES look good on the outside, if that makes sense.

The wraps though, that is awesome, I tied a piece of string around one lumpy weird matted piece before we left the house the other day-vain,I know. ..and when we got home I took it out to replace it with the hemp cord- and that thing was SOLID,and round!That quick. I can see how it will help with that whole congo party the back always tries to work into...but right now,very baby dreads,hell,not even dreads yet so it doesn't really matter.

I washed it yesterday(well ,beyond rinses and stuff I was doing-I SCRUBBED my scalp)
, and yay- all my hair is still sectioned, and still knotting.surprised me.Most people complain about that 1st wash and how the sections fall loose.Mine feels tighter now even. Awesome.
I also finally came to the conclusion, I need to stop lurking dread mesage boards, stop googling info and pics, stop messing it. The ony advice ANYANY place has about natural dreads, esspecially this early LEAVE THEM ALONE! It is even noticable, by the fact that the ones in the front of my head that I have put in the most twisting and palm rolling, are basically twisted hair, they are NOT as neat and solid feeling as the ones I have left the hell alone.

For a good long while ,I need to stop thinking about my head. stop fiddling, stop touching- beyond the occasional seperation of them when I wake up, trying to stick together.Let go , and let it be, so I need to stop freaking thinking about it all the damn time , because it is just going to be crazy for a LONG while-pateince ...."stop thinking about it" I say,after I spend an hour typing all about it.
Well, I had to tell you.keep you updated :) .
If ya were interested,Forgive me if I post less about it in the next few weeks, beyond pics of headgear, or weirdness.




---
Well, anyway,... after some trial an error- including running all the way back to LOWES because he got the wrong brand , Ri turned off the power(which Rory thought was scary but cool) and managed to get the AC back on! hooray central air is my BFF!

Ri ran to the store and came home with a treat for each of us..he wanted cowmilk for his cookies, so he got me a bucket of soda, the kid a bag of cheetos, and the dog a can of food. We are simple like that.
-my child is crazy...


and stays up till dawn.
Leaving me awake...unable to sleep.
crapola.
I went to bed at like 10am yesterday.. and slept like a rock until my phone rang at one or so and woke me up. I missed it still, and didn't call them back... I just took a shower.
Lissy called me later and said: "The baby is ok, he is GREAT"...I was like "um.ok?"-
that was her way of telling me he had been in the hospital all night... by first telling me he is fine LOL, only my sis would.
He has been congested- and is currently on antibiotics for an ear infection- Thursday, they had been in St.Auggy - she was breasfeeding him, all of the sudden he turned white and went limp.After a second he seemed ok,except VERY sleepy... so they rushed to the hospital.Flagler put them in an ambulance to JAX pediatrics, they ran a whole slew of tests(I swear its like "OOOOooo a medicaid patient what expensive shit can we do?" ) and then pretty much told her he chocked/inhaled some breastmilk but he is fine.I wonder if Lissy has recovered from the scare though?
Lissy posted a status on myspace mentioning it... next thing I know my grandmother is calling me in hysterics because Missy ,told AuntMarla- that Nickolai was in the hospital.She was happy to hear he was fine.Gotta love the phonechain,

Anyway. I threw some stuff in the dehydrator, Rory LOVED dried zucchini and squash snacks.
Cleaned up the house abit, laundry, dishes- none of the major stuff I shoulda done...played with photoshop-cleaned up this great pic of Sari and Lily(go back to an older post and you can compare the original)

but still mostly lazed around.
Rory tortured the poor dog all day- spending most the day curled up in the closed WITH her! To the point the poor dog went outside and laid in the rain to get some peace.(she loves the attention as much as she protests-I know she does) . Then Rory threw a HUGE tantrum and spent a long bit of time in timeout.oooo child is trying lately! Once she let of some steam and rested in timeout, she came out and apologized for being mean to me, and was an angel.
I made garbanzo beans and Spanish rice for dinner.Rory ate a whole bowl too!Ri came home later than I expected, it was pretty slow at his work-still rain rain rain.

It is 'sposed to be clear today. The Blue Crab festival starts today- but I haven't slept,and Ri has to work tonight... Ri and I are hoping it will still be going Monday. The Blue Crab is where we 1st kissed 10 yrs ago !!It's sorta special .. they almost canceled it this year due to budget-I was beyond thrilled when they decided to have it! Ten years is BIG! The end of this month will be ten years I have been with Ri. We passed the setup when we were in town Thursday and Rory was all excited by the site of the rides and carnival stuff... so it could be fun. Now that she is big enough to ride things...


Well, I do think there was much more- but I need some sleep, my belly is killing me.
Besides, I would be shocked if most anyone made it through all my ramblings to the end of this post. ..and I am not going to read over this before I post it right now either , so forgive my insomniatic nocturnal mess.
PEACE AND TOFU CHICkEN GREASE,
BABYHELLFIRE

Monday, May 18, 2009

That's what it means to feel froggy!

Friday , Saturday , Sunday, Monday-robot voice... can't find the image I want to go with that from ATHF. .. alas, to blog.
Man, some NASTY weather rolled in the end/begining of the week. Rory was in desperate need of some outside time though... so , when we spotted a break in the weather I filled up her kiddie pool.
I took sooo many pictures of her playing in the pool I had to find away to put them all together.,, lets just say this little 30 sec vid is the result of lots of trial and error and battling.


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She stayed in that pool for over an hour! Glad she got some suntime in, considering how gross it has been since. I made us orange smoothies while she was out there, Rory decided to finally give such things a chance- AND loved it!, I made her at least two more before we ran out of oj!
had one of those weird hungry days Friday- where I ate everything in sight and found nothing that made me feel whole..
shame too, because I finally felt full that night when Ri called saying he was starving and contemplating a midnight Bk run. He bought him and Rory some food, and a GIANT soda for me:) ..AND some ben&jerrys ice cream from the store.hooray! Thats sort of thing had Rory in PJs and passed out sooner than expect... though it was still very late..

Our schedule is nearing nocturnal... not AS bad though.Well, its still AM when we wake up.
Ri had the day off Saturday.
He woke up with Rory and let me sleep in. He needed to go into St.Augustine to get his oil changed. I had a lot to do round the house, and figured I could get it done with Rory out with him, so I stayed home.
He didn't know that the dealership closed early on Saturday, and got there far too late to get his oil changed though :(. They still spent the day out though, had fun walking around a festival and did some shopping, while I managed to get a lot done around the house. I should have made them dinner though, Rory came home hungry and grumpy. Ri ended up cooking us some dinner.
Val called and said she would be up late and we should come hang out in the hot tub.
Rory LOVES Seth. - they almost seem to have some weird onlychild mindmeld. Rory says he is her best friend ,even though he is twice her age. .. and Val says Seth claims Rory doesn't annoy him like other kids do.
Rory and Seth played in the hot tub..


Seth cheese Rory out


..but we (the adults -LOL) just hang out giggling and chatting instead.

We had sort of made plans to go back to Vals Sunday- but the bottom finally fell out of the sky that had been threatening for days.
Rain rain rain rain AND ...




more rain. duh!

I had put my hair up (in case we did go swimming, to keep it out of the pool) .
..then when I realized we weren't gonna make it there, I played around with make up and pictures:
my head/hair has been sooooo itchy!!!!!! soon I will need to wash my scalp(I have been using bakingsoda and lemon juice to wash my hair for at least a year so I am already in habit of washing my SCALP, not my hair, and also needing to wash my hair less often )..but I do not look forward to the whole washing,reseperating retwisting palmrolling thing-well, no.. I DO!, but I should hold off a little longer before I do all that let them find come into their own more.. or some such stuff I read...
I am thinking tomorrow I will at least hit it with the "lock accelerater"(water,lemon juice,salt) again.
hard to get a decent self photo of the side of my hair-

..almost



THERE!!

My hair has been getting better response than I thought. Lissy and Rory seem to share the sentiment that it is very me. Val was impressed with the added volume.
I love the flow of the natrual waves of it all right now... its frizzy, and itchy, and tangly, but its growing on me more than I expected.(yes, I laughed when I type that bit about my dreads "growing ON me" I make myself laugh at least).

It was crazy stormy all day.The power held strong surprisingly. Rory and Noobie were scared of the thunder, Rory built a fort under the dining room table , and Noobie followed her.They spent the evening hiding and sharing peanuts and pineapples(why does my dog love pineapples??)

I made some of those setain hotwingz for lunch.. and then the leftovers gave me the idea of pizza,
-mmm setain hot wingz on pizza with spinch dipped in ranch.I ran the idea of pizza past Ri ,when he called on his way home, he was all for that.. if we were cooking :P.
Rory was a bit fussy by dinner time, but she was an excellent pizza chef helper.I gave her the seasonings for the sauce, and she put a pinch-or a dash or a shake for each one, came out perfect. She also is becoming an expert dough kneader!
She just wanted cheese on her pizza, so I let her sprinkle on the mozz, AND add some slice provalone .
I dare say :her simple double cheese pizza came out better than the hotwingz spinach pizza did.
Ri did help a bit with the cooking part, as much as he tried to restrain himself.He also brought home milk, bananas and throwback pepsi-woot!
I love pizza night, and as much as I slack in that area it is nice to have dinner ready when Ri gets home on occasion.

The ONLY thing better than pizza night, is day after pizza night leftover day!
I got another day of sleeping in today, as the rain was so terrible the taco stand Ri work Mon/tuesday at was closed.Pizza ,throwback pepsi and video games allllll day. I think I have given my addiction to Fable to Ri...


I got over it when I hit a creature I couldn't kill and got frustrated,the opposite of me, he is making his character as evil as possible though.
between fable and my new fav show greenwing..I find myself saying things awkward backwards(or maybe forwards) ways I wouldn't normally.. or just using words I wouldn't normally.SO?bugger off chicken chaser!

Ri managed to pry himself away and make cookies with Rory- as I got stuck on the laptop battling putting that vid together.
Poor Rory is CAGEY with this weather. We have had a really slack day.I did clean the kitchen , but Rory's indoor activities Littlepets,coloring,playdoh- was just not enough energy for her. She has spent most the night being toooo bouncy,too handsy, a bit too whiney and just generally understimulated looking for an outlet...HELP!!

It doesn't look like the rain will ever end, we went out for a smoke break and watched the powerline bounce into the tree and arc! I hope our power stays on, it hasn't been thundering-or even very windy today..just rainrainrain with no end in sight.I admt I love the rain, it is nice to sleep,or curl up with coffee in the rain,but this MAY be a bit much.
Ri most likely will not have work tomorrow either..and I don't know how we will manage to entertain the child.
Well, 3am and Rory says she is hungry(I am betting more tired than she will allow herself to consider),So I'm off!


PEACE AND TOFU CHICkEN GREASE,
BABYHELLFIRE

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Let's try some different things, and some more of the same

My bubble blowing junkie- this pic should probably have been in a much older post though, I forgot.. I will have to buy her more bubbles-also, geniousness that bubble bottle had a no spill lid! it took too long to come up with that idea. I love the outfit she picked out to wear, I would have never thought to match those things up. (ignore the Tupperware in the grass, was using it as a make shift bird feeder ,and it fell- yeah, you probably wouldn't have noticed it if i didn't point it out, just sayin).

Forgive the lived in look of my livingroom(Rory emptied the contents of my bag on the chair-and then, well, played)- I just think it is too cute.
I turned around from cleaning the kitchen to see Rory had a whole carriage ride set up in the living room.

Well-Somehow, Ri talked cowboys into giving him Saturday off... and he talked me into going out on the river on a rental boat to find a local spring to swim in.

Rory was all for that idea. as nervy as I was.
We half got lost navigating through the local area we SHOULD really know more about.. I mean, I have lived out here my ENTIRE life. We made it... and rented a tiny little bass boat.




He had to drag us a little over the sandbar.


Do you see Nessy the river monster?

OH! it's a bird
We got past the tricky sandbar and down saltsprings run- or whatever they call the little way into the spring. The spring was crowed, and deep and full of weeds. Ri and Rory jumped in- I didn't want any part of that... which upset RI a little.
He was like "you said you would try to have a good time"
-" I am. I don't enjoy swimming where I can't touch the bottom- or on weeds.Right now, staying In the boat is a good time.Not even sure I could get back in if I got out"
Yeah, I am chicken shit. I make no denial of that..
surprised the man I have been with almost 10 yrs would think this is in anyway new.

They swam a little bit before we rode off, Ri was hoping to find a place that fit my demanding criteria. I was just hoping he would get the boat moving enough to cool me off... it was over 100 degrees that day.(and most of the week when it wasn't raining, for that matter UGH!) When we headed back over the sand bar he had the idea we could pull the boat to the side and hang out there. It was SUPER shallow- but hey, all sand. fine with me. We swam a little bit before heading back. I got a bit of sun. Rory was all sun blocked up. I did my face - but didn't think to do the part of my neck/shoulder that my bathing suit cover/shirt left exposed-doh! Ri however, ended up MUCH worse off, he has a hat tan.He has been mocked. mercilessly.not by me though... of course ,not by me...

Ri kept telling me the new charger for the now cold and batteryless laptop, would be here "day after tomorrow", or "tomorrow"- forgetting that THAT day , was a Saturday and the UPS guy doesn't come on Saturday.... damn damn damn.double damn. I kept finding more and more things I could not do with dinoputer.OH- and in an effort to google a pic to go with the word "dinoputer" I found my pics,guess I use that term on my blog,and it is not common-hmmm. well then I demand it become more common, go forth and use it to descibe your decrepit ancheint computers.

Came home to a phone call from Lissy, one of her kittens-squishface- the one Rory and I liked, had died. She had got more and more lathargic, then suddenly started meowing funny and having tremors. Lissy and Steph rushed her to the vet, but they were too late :( . Lissy thinks she had gotten dehydrated . RickJames seemed to be having a hard time feeding them all . :(

At some point Saturday Ri went to visit Val, and brought back a gift for me- fancy homemade hippy soap from her freinds pagan shop! ooooo. Though, I think patchooli makes me sneeze. Very nice simple soaps that my skin seems to like, yay! I feel dumb though, I kept smelling this one called "Scarborough Fair" saying "WTF, why does it smell like pizza- what does that have to do with the fair" .. Ri was like read the ingrediants(somewhere,someone is already laughing) ...
"parsley, sage, rosemary, and thyme" - oh yes. deduct any hippy points I may have had.
We went outside and played frizbee for a bit- while Rory sprinkled the "fairy attracting dust" that Val got her from the shop(which looked like a baggy of salt and glitter if ya ask me) all over the yard and in her fairy house.

Lissy called me to tell me she was freaked out by some strange noise she heard around her house, and a little by the cats- afraid another was looking weak :( , said she was heading out to stay the night with mom.
I Stayed up getting addicted to FABLE on the Xbox, because of my suctacular internets. Rory was irrtated I wouldn't let her play- Ri was like "let mommy play, she never plays" Went to bed really bothered the game kept calling me "chicken chaser".

Sooooo. Sunday.Mothersday. Damn. I had a grumpy irritable day. Woke up immidatly frustrated. I had expected to go with mom and sisters to Grandma the Grapes. Instead it was apparent they had went on without me. :( . It was too hot to smoke- I wanted to.too hot for coffee, and I didnt want iced. Stupid text mass message happy mothersday foward cost me 50cent - I thought it was something important.sigh.The stupid dinoputer wouldn't load for the life of itself.
I was tired, and took a nap on the couch. Then, mom shows up. They had been to grandmas and left already. I started to get ready. ..not even sure if I wanted to go anywhere. They were only going to go grocery shopping- Amy was planning on staying a few nights with Lissy and needed provisions..
Mom did have to stop back by GrammytheGrapes to bring her the present she forgot, and I did sort of want to tag along.
Lost my cellphone, maybe still angry at it for not telling me it was a useless foward text massage.Realized the camera was still in the car .Lost my keys. crap crap crap. Not usually stuff that grates me like that but dammit. I just wanted to go hide and cry.
I did end up having an alright time.Cuddling my fat baby nephew and letting them spoil Rory's brattyself.

At least I got in a good laugh, when I was holding MrCole in the store and asked Lissy to hand me his blankey...as she hands me his winnie the pooh blanket I coo to Cole "aww poor baby has poo on his blankey".. Lissy joke, I really didn't expect her to do more than give me the stink eye about my lame bevis&butthead Pooh/poo joke, but she fell for it! Examined the whole blanket muttering about how she DID change him on it, and turning it over. I was silently shaking with laughter too hard to tell her.Mom was laughing so hard there were tears. Lissy caught on and tossed it on me angry- I seriously did not expect her to fall for that.I needed that laugh though.
They gathered up loads of food and we headed out. I downed soda and junkfood most of the day.

Went to moms for a bit. Lissy and Amy decided to leave 1st- they had a few things to do around Lissy's house before the night was through. Mom, JJ Rory and I headed to Grammy The Grapes- Gram loved the little puppy perfume bottle MIL gave me to give her(Ri's mom got them for the perfume but didn't want them, when I told her my gram collects them they were instantly in my bag. :) ) I was happy to see she grabbed them dusted them off and threw them right on her shelf, I was afraid she might not like them.
It wasnt too terribly late when we got home- snacking on junk and downing more soda. mmm throwback pepsi... more caffeine.
When Ri got home I fished the camera out of the car...Rory demanded I take pics of her , and posed









Where did my child learn to model???
Has she been watching Americas Next Top model over my shoulder when I thought she was busy coloring or playing elaborate games with her Littlepets??

On the bright side of the grumpy day. Lissy said all the kittens survived the night/day she was away. Steph came to pick up the girl that was acting a bit lethargic. Fearing she is also dehydrated they weaned her to kitten formula and round the clock attention and a vet visit. She seems to doing well, and Lissy says the boy kittens are doing awesome, though she fears rickjames is once again angry and in heat- time to fix her up.
Another night I gave up battling dinoputer and played Fable... until I got stuck on a stupid level and realized there isn;t much I can do in the early levels to change anything.Why am I no good at being evil?huh.why? damn chicken chaser.

Monday was good. Woke up to hear Ri on the phone with someone... he got a job offer. Val's folks had bragged to a friend how awesome he is , and the guy begged Ri to come in. Not wanting to burn any possible bridges he may need later, he agreed,despite his TWO jobs and full schedule- but planned to pretty much go in and nicely tell the man, NO.
When I finally crawled out of bed, it was nasty dreary rainy out- I took a shower.. as I got dressed someone knocked- why does everyone always have such bad timing. I rushed to the door YAY YAY NEW POWER CORD we have laptop. OOoooo I couldn't wait to get back to surfing the net in realtime, with sound and video :) .

I get out of the shower and decide not to brush my hair.
ugh.my hair.My hair has turned to crap. More than every month Ri needs to trim my split ends.It just seems to be splitting and breaking faster. I have run out of options. I am not ready for the super short hair my hair is trying to be.PLUS. hard water.HARD HARD water that even my year of being "shampoo free"-using baking soda and lemon juice haven't seemed to remedy.In the past month or two our water became harder than ever.I need to scrub the tub more often.change shower curtains.we busted through our second sink mounted water filter- our water literally ATE the attachment(we switched to a fridge pitcher filter)...and my hair and skin has been terrible. I can't deal with it. it is always frizy or oily, and tangly, and scummy -and falling out.
What to do..what to do.

You know..
if you grow dreads, the hair that is splitting,shedding,breaking damaged- even falling out will dread into your hair.. and dread extensions are cheapppp much cheaper than the hair peice extensions I have and was looking into??
hmmm.well.
Oh.yes. you are going to hate me for this. I dropped my brush...
then spent Tuesday doing something really crazy.
"twirling, twisting, and ripping" the natural sections of my hair.
my thin straight whitegirl hair took it better than expected.




I feel like a caveman.it will probably be loose and messy-for a good lOOoooong time.. in fact as bad as this might look, this might be the best it looks for a long time.soak it in.
Though,Lissy says she is excited to help me wrap it- and maybe add some extensions.. I wonder how that will look? .. or how long I should put that on hold for these to get crazy?

Rory- the child who regularly spends hours twisting and tangling my hair, says she loves it.
It feels funny, and I look crazy- and Rory tells me "it looks very mommyish"...I guess so. lol.

AAnyway.. if you can get past that bit of surprise.
Ri did go on the local job interview- didn't shave wore his work clothes and had no intention of doing much besides kindly declining ..the guy offered him a fair amount for a closer job starting as management.. and begged Ri to try it out. Somehow he coerced Ri into working there thursday. Crazy how he goes from hardly any job to almost three. Poor guy.

I haven't been sleeping well. I hardly slept at all lastnight. stress maybe.I dunno, seems typical for me. About once a month to not get to sleep right.
Rory woke up after me this morning.She was dissappointed it was another nasty day.I let her play her (annoying) Dora playstation game most the day though - and made her some yummy breakfast and lunch. ..I spent most of the afternoon catching up on my HULU queue - when the grumpy net connection allowed.

Ri's mom came over after we Had lunch. She brought Rory a coloringbook.. and I had to finally admit to someone in person, that I am trying to dread my hair..eek. She took it better than I expected.One hurdle jumped.She expressed concern over my hair being dirty... but technically I may need to clean it more as oily hair won't tangle :P . I do need a blowdryer though.yup yup.Mildew in my hair is a scary scary thought.
As is the thought that the next yr or more I may have some pretty attrotious hair. .. but I am THAT not ready to let go of my hair... weird reasoning isn't it?

Ri mom stayed awhile, Rory tried to stall her and play with her as long as she possbly could.
My belly was/is killing me... I should not have made us scrambled eggs for lunch. it tore me up. I used to love eggs, now every time I eat them I pay the price NO FAIR!!
I took a short bath and let Rory play online before Ri came home. super late.
He brought Rory goldfish crackers and pretty much came in and crashed on the couch. Rory was NOT far behind him. and I am still up. going to refill my coffee and smoke more. Two bad bad things to do at 6am.
night folks.
PEACE AND TOFU CHICkEN GREASE,
babyhellfire